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1. Because I said so! | 因为是我说哒! |
2. My mom used to scare me with this one: “Put on clean underwear! If you get hit by a bus, all the nurses will see those dirty ones!”. Always wondered which situation would have been worse. | 我妈以前会这么说来吓唬我:“给我穿条干净内裤!不穿的话想想要是你被公交车撞了,护士们就会看到你的脏内裤。” 这估计是最糟糕的状况了吧。 |
3. My mom told me: “All you had to do was drink water. Water will be the cure for anything. If your head hurt, if you got a cold, if you are two inches away from dying …” | 我妈跟我说:“喝水就好啦。喝水治百病。头疼喝水,感冒喝水,离死亡只差两英寸也……” |
4. Have you lost your cotton-picking mind! | 你脑子坏掉啦! |
5. If you fall out of that tree and break both legs, don’t come running to me. | 要是你从树上掉下来摔断两条腿,别跑过来找我。 |
6. I should have swallowed you! | 当初就该把你塞回去! |
7. 80% kids will get this one: “Don’t sit too close to the TV, you’ll ruin your eyes!” | 很多小孩儿都听过这句话:“离电视远点儿!眼睛会搞瞎!” |
8. You may do whatever you want but not while you are living under my roof. | 你想干嘛都可以,但只要住在我眼皮子底下一天,就不行。 |
9. I was about 9 or 10 when mom told me: “You’d better learn to wipe your butt better or do your own laundry. No woman wants to live with a man who has dirty draws.” | 那时候我才9岁10岁吧,我妈跟我说:“你要么学会擦屁股,要么就自己洗衣服。没有哪个女人会跟内裤上有粑粑印的男人生活。” |
10. If I can carry you for 9 months, you can carry those groceries from the car to the house. | 我的肚子能驮着你9个月,你就不能把这些菜从车上搬到家里? |
11. “I won’t get mad if you just tell me.” That is the biggest lie moms ever say. | “你早跟我说,我会生气吗?” 这估计是妈妈们最大的谎言。 |
12. Why do you still live in my house? You are 35. | 你为什么还住在我家?你35岁啦。 |
13. Wait until your dad gets home. | 等你爸回家有你好看。 |
14. Wait until you have children. | 等你有孩子你就知道了。 |
15. “Don’t make me turn this car around!” We all know she’s not going to turn the car around. | “别逼我掉头打道回府!” 其实我们都知道她不会掉头的。 |
16. Mummy’s just having grape juice like you are. (pouring wine into her wineglass) | 和你一样妈咪只是在喝果汁啦(倒红酒)。 |
17. Don’t you roll your eyes at me! I’ll take you out and make another one who looks just like you. | 你再敢跟我翻白眼!我把你轰出去然后再生一个跟你长得一模一样的。 |
18. Mom: What’s my passcode again? | Me: Same as your phone number. Mom: What’s my phone number again? |
妈:“我密码是多少来着?” | 我:“你手机号” 妈:“我手机号是多少来着?” |
19. Mom: “Who did this?” | Me: “I don’t know.” Mom: “I didn’t ask WHO did it, I am telling you to pick it up!” |
妈:“谁弄的!” | 我:“我不知道。” 妈:“我没问你是谁弄的,我是叫你给我捡起来!” |
20. “I love my children equally”. And we all know that’s a lie. | “我对孩子们一视同仁。” 其实我们都知道是假的。 |
21. I brought you into this world and I can TAKE YOU OUT. | 我可以把你带到这个世界上,我也可以把你轰出去。 |
22. You better not ever start a fight. But if someone starts one with you, YOU BETTER FINISH IT!” | 人不犯你你不犯人,人若犯你你最好给我把TA打趴下。 |
23. “You are beautiful and people will love you.” — Where are those people momma? | “你很漂亮啦,会有人爱你的” —— 老妈,这些人在哪? |
24. If you don’t eat your carrots, you won’t be able to see in the dark. | 要是你不吃胡萝卜,晚上你就会瞎掉。 |
25. This isn’t a hotel, you know. | 家里不是酒店,你知道吧。 |
26. Having to say everything twice, having to say everything twice. | 每句话都要说两遍!真的每句话都要说两遍! |
27. Close the door. We are not cooling the whole neighborhood. | 把门关上!我们不是在给整个街区制冷! |
28. If you don’t clean the gaps between your toes properly, you’ll start growing potatoes out of them. | 你要是不认认真真洗脚指头中间那块儿,就会有土豆从那儿长出来。 |
29. Dad is a millionaire – in the least worth currency in the world. | 你爸其实是个百万富翁——以世界上最便宜的货币算。 |
30. You kids are the reason mommy drinks. | 你们这帮熊孩子就是妈妈喝酒的原因。 |
你的妈妈都说过哪些让你捧腹不已的话呢? | |
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