“讨好型人格”上热搜，这些典型表现，你占几条？
What Is People-Pleasing?

该剧总结了几个讨好型人格的常见表现，看看你占几条？

❷Catering to other people’s needs.

❹Not knowing how to say no.

❻Enduring censure silently.

❽Afraid of negative comments.

For many, the eagerness to please stems from self-worth issues. They hope that saying yes to everything asked of them will help them feel accepted and liked.

Other people-pleasers have a history of maltreatment, and somewhere along the way, they decided that their best hope for better treatment was to try to please the people who mistreated them. Over time, for them, people-pleasing became a way of life.

Our most recent research examined a dataset that included more than 2.5 million people from 102 nations and compared two groups of people.

The first group consisted of people with personality traits such as high levels of assertiveness, creativity, and openness, and low levels of warmth, niceness, and agreeableness. The second group contained people with the reverse personality traits.

❶ Being a misfit doesn’t bother everybody.

❷ Assertive, creative, and open people who don’t care all that much whether or not they fit in do not suffer as much from being a misfit as people who are warmhearted, nice, and agreeable who, then again, have a particularly strong desire to fit in.

The next time you see a nice but not very assertive person who doesn’t seem to fit into a particular group of people, it’s worth remembering that s/he is likely to feel particularly uncomfortable. To help this person feel better, you may want to talk to this person and look for things you have in common.