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我的生活海伦·凯勒自传
The Story of My Life by Helen Keller

英文中文双语对照双语交替

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Chapter III

第三章

Meanwhile the desire to express myself grew. The few signs I used became less and less adequate, and my failures to make myself understood were invariably followed by outbursts of passion. I felt as if invisible hands were holding me, and I made frantic efforts to free myself. I struggled--not that struggling helped matters, but the spirit of resistance was strong within me; I generally broke down in tears and physical exhaustion. If my mother happened to be near I crept into her arms, too miserable even to remember the cause of the tempest. After awhile the need of some means of communication became so urgent that these outbursts occurred daily, sometimes hourly.

在成长的过程中，我越来越渴望表达自己的意愿，但是我使用的几个简单的手势已经远远不够用了；而且，当我无法表明自己的意图时，我就会气急败坏。我感到似乎有一双看不见的手正在抓着我，而我则拼命地想挣脱束缚。我努力抗争——当然并不是希求解决问题，而是想为我内心深处强烈的反抗精神寻找出路。我通常会哭闹不止，直至筋疲力尽。如果母亲碰巧在身边，我会悄悄地钻进她的怀里。我伤心至极，乃至于忘记了愤怒的原因。后来，这种情绪的爆发在每天，或者每小时都会发生，因此，对于交流的需求于我是如此地迫切。

My parents were deeply grieved and perplexed. We lived a long way from any school for the blind or the deaf, and it seemed unlikely that any one would come to such an out-of-the-way place as Tuscumbia to teach a child who was both deaf and blind. Indeed, my friends and relatives sometimes doubted whether I could be taught. My mother's only ray of hope came from Dickens's "American Notes." She had read his account of Laura Bridgman, and remembered vaguely that she was deaf and blind, yet had been educated. But she also remembered with a hopeless pang that Dr. Howe, who had discovered the way to teach the deaf and blind, had been dead many years. His methods had probably died with him; and if they had not, how was a little girl in a far-off town in Alabama to receive the benefit of them?

我的父母陷入了深深的痛苦和困惑之中。当时，我们家离任何一所盲人或聋哑学校都很远，而且，似乎也不会有任何人能跑到像图斯康比亚这种偏僻的地方，就为了教一个又聋又瞎的小孩子。事实上，我的朋友和亲属们一度怀疑我真的能否接受教育。我母亲唯一的希望来自狄更斯的《美国札记》，她曾读过他写的劳拉·布里吉曼的故事，而且她隐约记得那个女孩子也是又聋又瞎，然而却接受了正规教育。不过她也感到希望渺茫，因为豪博士，也就是探索传授盲聋人知识的先驱，已经去世很多年了。而豪博士的教育方法也许会随着他的去世而消亡，果真如此，那么一个住在亚拉巴马偏远小镇的小姑娘又如何从中受益呢？

When I was about six years old, my father heard of an eminent oculist in Baltimore, who had been successful in many cases that had seemed hopeless. My parents at once determined to take me to Baltimore to see if anything could be done for my eyes.

我六岁大的时候，我的父亲听说在巴尔的摩有一个著名的眼科医生，他曾成功地医治过许多看似无望的病人。于是，我的父母决定带我去巴尔的摩，看看是不是能治好我的眼睛。

The journey, which I remember well, was very pleasant. I made friends with many people on the train. One lady gave me a box of shells. My father made holes in these so that I could string them, and for a long time they kept me happy and contented. The conductor, too, was kind. Often when he went his rounds I clung to his coat tails while he collected and punched the tickets. His punch, with which he let me play, was a delightful toy. Curled up in a corner of the seat I amused myself for hours making funny little holes in bits of cardboard.

那是一次愉快的旅行，我依然有着十分清晰的记忆。在火车上，我同许多人成了朋友。有位女士送给我一盒贝壳。我父亲在上面钻出孔洞，这样我就可以把贝壳串在一起，很长时间我都沉醉其中，乐此不疲。列车长也是个友善的人，当他在车厢里四处走动，为乘客检票打孔的时候，我常会靠在他的衣摆上。他还让我玩他的打孔器，那实在是一种很有趣的玩具。我蜷缩在座位的角落里自得其乐，一连好几个小时在一片片纸板上打洞玩。

My aunt made me a big doll out of towels. It was the most comical shapeless thing, this improvised doll, with no nose, mouth, ears or eyes--nothing that even the imagination of a child could convert into a face. Curiously enough, the absence of eyes struck me more than all the other defects put together. I pointed this out to everybody with provoking persistency, but no one seemed equal to the task of providing the doll with eyes. A bright idea, however, shot into my mind, and the problem was solved. I tumbled off the seat and searched under it until I found my aunt's cape, which was trimmed with large beads. I pulled two beads off and indicated to her that I wanted her to sew them on my doll. She raised my hand to her eyes in a questioning way, and I nodded energetically. The beads were sewed in the right place and I could not contain myself for joy; but immediately I lost all interest in the doll. During the whole trip I did not have one fit of temper, there were so many things to keep my mind and fingers busy.

我的姑妈用毛巾给我做了一个大布娃娃。这是一个滑稽而怪异的玩偶，大概是准备得过于仓促，娃娃没有鼻子、嘴、耳朵和眼睛——甚至凭借一个小孩子的想象力都无法拼凑出娃娃的脸孔。可十分奇怪的是，我并不在乎娃娃头上的其他器官，唯独眼睛的缺失深深触动了我。我固执地向大家指出我的发现，可是似乎没有一个人能够为娃娃添加一双眼睛。然而，由于我的灵机一动，难题终于得到了解决。我翻下座位开始摸索，直到发现了姑妈的披肩，而披肩上面装饰着不少大珠子。我揪下来两颗珠子，并且示意姑妈帮我把它缝到娃娃身上。于是姑妈把我的手放在了她的眼睛上面，而我则使劲地点头。结果，珠子被缝到了恰当的位置，我简直无法抑制住自己的兴奋。可是很快我就失去了对布娃娃的所有兴趣。在旅途中，我没有发过一次脾气，因为有太多的事情让我的头脑和手指忙于应付。

When we arrived in Baltimore, Dr. Chisholm received us kindly: but he could do nothing. He said, however, that I could be educated, and advised my father to consult Dr. Alexander Graham Bell of Washington, who would be able to give him information about schools and teachers of deaf or blind children. Acting on the doctor's advice, we went immediately to Washington to see Dr. Bell, my father with a sad heart and many misgivings, I wholly unconscious of his anguish, finding pleasure in the excitement of moving from place to place. Child as I was, I at once felt the tenderness and sympathy which endeared Dr. Bell to so many hearts, as his wonderful achievements enlist their admiration. He held me on his knee while I examined his watch, and he made it strike for me. He understood my signs, and I knew it and loved him at once. But I did not dream that that interview would be the door through which I should pass from darkness into light, from isolation to friendship, companionship, knowledge, love.

我们来到巴尔的摩，切斯霍尔姆医生热情地接待了我们，但是他并没有对我做任何治疗。他对父亲说，我应该接受教育，并且建议父亲向华盛顿的亚历山大·格雷厄姆·贝尔博士进行咨询，他可以告诉我们关于聋哑和盲童学校的师资情况。按照医生的建议，我们立刻前往华盛顿去见贝尔博士。我的父亲疑虑重重，感到前途未卜。而我完全没有意识到他的痛苦，只是觉得在路途间往来其乐无穷。虽然是个小孩子，可我马上就感到了贝尔博士的善良和强烈的同情心，当时他功成名就，深受世人敬仰。他把我抱在他的膝盖上，我对他的怀表产生了兴趣，为了让我明白，他不停地敲打怀表。他理解我的手势，我知道这一点，立刻就喜欢上了他。但是我并不抱什么幻想，把这次会晤当成是一扇引领我从黑暗走向光明，从孤独走向友谊、关怀、知识和爱的大门。

Dr. Bell advised my father to write to Mr. Anagnos, director of the Perkins Institution in Boston, the scene of Dr. Howe's great labours for the blind, and ask him if he had a teacher competent to begin my education. This my father did at once, and in a few weeks there came a kind letter from Mr. Anagnos with the comforting assurance that a teacher had been found. This was in the summer of 1886. But Miss Sullivan did not arrive until the following March.

贝尔博士建议我父亲给阿纳戈诺斯先生写封信，他是波士顿帕金斯学院的院长，也是豪博士伟大事业的继承人。贝尔博士的意思是，看看阿纳戈诺斯先生那里有没有一位能够教我的老师。我的父亲立即写了信。几个星期后，阿纳戈诺斯先生便回了一封热情洋溢的信，他让我们放心，说已经为我们找到了一位老师。这件事发生在1886年夏天，那时苏立文小姐还没有来，她是来年三月才到的。

Thus I came up out of Egypt and stood before Sinai, and a power divine touched my spirit and gave it sight, so that I beheld many wonders. And from the sacred mountain I heard a voice which said, "Knowledge is love and light and vision."

就这样，我走出埃及，站在了西奈山前。一股神圣的力量触摸着我的灵魂，它不但带给了我光明，还让我“看”到了许多奇迹。我似乎听到了那个来自圣山的声音：“知识是爱，是光，是佳地。”