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Great Expectations

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10 Pip and Herbert talk about love

I returned to London， dreaming of the beautiful girl， now a woman， who had so influenced my childhood，and who， I hoped， would share my future life． I am sorry to say I did not think about dear， good Joe at all． I felt I had to ex－press my feelings to someone， and so that evening I told Herbert my secret．

Instead of being surprised， as I expected， my friend replied，

‘I know that already， Handel．You never told me， but it was obvious．You've always loved Estella．It's very lucky that you seem to have been chosen to marry her．Does she， er，admire you？’

I shook my head sadly．‘Not at all． And Herbert， you may think me lucky．I have great expectations，I know．But all that depends on one person！ And I still don't really know how much I'll receive， or when！ Nothing is certain！’

‘Now， Handel，’said Herbert cheerfully，‘don't lose hope．Mr Jaggers himself told you you would have a large fortune，didn't he？ He would never make a mistake about something like that．Anyway， you'll be twenty－one soon．Perhaps you'll discover more then．’

‘Thank you，Herbert！’ I said， feeling much better．

‘But I want to ask you something， my dear Handel，’said Herbert，looking serious for once．‘Think of Estella， and her education， and how unhappy you may be with her．Couldn't you possibly-and I'm saying this as a friend， remember-couldn't you forget about her？’

‘I know you're right， Herbert，’I said miserably，‘but I can never stop loving her．’

‘Well， never mind！’said Herbert．‘Now I have something to tell you myself． I am engaged．’

‘May I ask the young lady's name？’

‘Clara．Her mother's dead， and she lives with her father．We must keep our feelings for each other secret， because I haven't enough money to marry her yet． As soon as I start in－suring ships we can marry．’Herbert tried to look hopeful about his future， but this time he couldn't even manage his usual cheerful smile．

One day I received a letter which made my heart beat fast．

‘I am coming to London the day after tomorrow by the mid-day coach．Miss Havisham wants you to meet me．

Estella．’

If there had been time，I would have ordered several new suits．I ate nothing until the day arrived， and all morning I waited impatiently for the coach．She seemed more beautiful than ever， and her manner to me was very pleasant， as I took her to the house in London where Miss Havisham had arranged for her to stay． Her life seemed to be planned by Miss Havisham right down to the smallest detail．I only hoped I was part of that plan．